Sprinkling The Infield

Pull up a seat, grab a coaster and let Todd Brommelkamp pour you a double shot of words with a punctuation chaser. Consider this the equivalent of giving your mind a stiff drink. Just remember this blog, like most things in life, is best enjoyed in moderation.

Never one to turn down a good time, Todd will hang out with anyone (even a pair of cardboard cutouts) as long as the drinks keep coming. Just don't tell him these guys aren't real because it would break his bacon-clogged little heart. 

So you're tired of the ALS "Ice Bucket Challenge" eh?

So you don't like the videos of people dumping water over their heads as part of the ALS "Ice Bucket Challenge" on social media sites like Facebook and Twitter?

Shut the ____ up.

As the trend has become more widespread and more high-profile members of society such as actors, politicians and athletes have begun participating in the movement designed to raise awareness about a disease most know little about, it's become apparent many are tired of what they view as nothing more than the latest 'look at me' craze.

Shut the ____ up.

In the past week I've seen references to those participating as "narcissistic."

Guess what else is narcissistic?

Let's start with plastering social media with photos of your kids.

Or your vacation.

Or your enormous new house.

Or that great new Mexican place with the giant margaritas where they wear sombreros and sing "Happy Birthday" to you in Spanish.

If you've ever shared a thought – any thought – on Twitter, you're also a narcissist. Who honestly believes other people in this world care what your dog just did or what you think of the latest episode of "Bachelor in Paradise?"

While we're at it, how about those who take a giant dump on something that seems to be doing infinitely more good than it is harm just because THEY feel THEIR opinion is of any more value than those soaking themselves in freezing water.

Shut the ____ up.

You think this is "slacktivism" and what's going on with these videos and small donations won't make a difference despite the fact they've resulted in over $15 million in donations.

Shut the ____ up.

You think cancer is a worse way to die and it kills more people so everyone should forget about "minor" killers like ALS and, oh, forget it…


Maybe you're just "tired" of all the ice bucket videos. Maybe you're "over" them.

I'm not.

Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis is something I don't ever want to deal with. I don't want to be told I have roughly 1,000 days left on Earth. I don't want my family and my friends to watch me get buried alive inside my own body because its muscles no longer are capable of receiving signals from my brain.

If the money raised from the "Ice Bucket Challenge" can help prevent that fate from befalling a single person it's worth it.

Or is your time spent on social media scrolling past those videos (or worse yet, secretly watching them) somehow more valuable than that?

Because thinking that way sounds kind of, I don't know, narcissistic to me.

I'm proud to have participated in the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge.

I'm proud to have donated to ALSA.org.

If you don't like that just remember this the next time you:

*Ask me to donate to your Kickstarter campaign (The idea sucks anyway)

*Ask me to buy your kids Girl Scout cookies (I'll probably still do it)

*Ask me to SHARE THIS VIDEO because Bill Gates is going to donate a $1 for everyone who does so (That stuff's fake. You know that, right?)

*Ask me to pray for this or that or the other thing because what's going on in your life is so much more pressing to God than what's happening elsewhere in the world in war zones and in Third World countries. (It isn't)

Yes, remember this. I'm not a narcissist.

I'm an a**hole.

Just like you.

So shut the ____ up and deal with it.
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Topics : Human Interest
People : Bill Gates

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